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« When Social Media and Dicks Collide | Main | Empty Seats At The Joe - As Goes The Economy, So Goes Playoff Attendance »

May 06, 2008

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WWB

I'm not quite as strict; if it's someone I haven't met but think I will meet professionally, I'll add them. But when it's me doing the friending, I have to know them first. Like today, I added my father, who signed up this morning. That was a unique experience.

Catch Up Lady

My mom is on FB too. I got a Gchat from my friend saying, "I just friended your mom on FB and I am sooooo excited." You know it's gone mainstream when...

jeremy epstein

Respectfully disagree. I've had people connect w/me on FB based on common friends/interests and over time, I've seen a lot of value in those connections. In particular, when I meet up with them in person, it's like I know them already, but beyond that, I am exposed to new people and new ideas.
Sure there are the self-promoters and spammers, whom I de-friend, but I find that on the whole, I come out ahead.

Catch Up Lady

@jeremey - I totally see the value in friending people you don't know, and get why people do it. But, for me personally (especially as a female) I just don't feel comfortable given the information and pictures I have up there (not that they are racy or overly informative, but still - just b/c you read my blog doens't mean you need to see pics of my birthday party, my sibs and I on vacation, or the inside of my house!)

I don't "use" Facebook enough to extract that much value from my contacts - Twitter on the other hand is much different story. I follow anyone that follows me who is offering value and find I can immediately get a lot back from those relationships.

jeremy epstein

I hear you and the female point is certainly valid, no doubt. I guess I'm coming to the realization that it's becoming near impossible to maintain a separation between 'personal' and 'professional.' We all need to be prepared for the lack of privacy era and the fact that there is just one 'you' to the world.

here's my post on the subject
http://www.jer979.com/igniting-the-revolution/there-s-only-one-you/

What Liz Said

I know what you mean. I have certain sites, such as my blog, that I use as avenues to get to know people I don't know in real life, but Facebook isn't one of them. It's like my island of real life on the internet.

But recently everything is starting to feel so small.

I get what you mean totally about real friends first, but I've also made some GREAT friends just online. I guess I just follow my gut now about people. It could go either way.

Catch Up Lady

@jeremey - I agree that your online self is an amalgamation of all the information you put out there, and other people put out there for you (tagging, etc.) The info I have on FB isn't salacious, it's just not something I want to have out there for the world to see at their will or as the result of a simple virtual friend request. Sure if someone REALLY wanted to see it they could probably figure out a way - but like in real life, ultimately there are parts of me that are held back for friends (made online or offline), and making my SN profiles private and controlling who can see them is my way of regulating that environment. I think there is a lot of value to be gained by pursuing a different route, but it's not for me at the moment.

@Liz - I agree that the one exception for me is my "blog friends." People like Jetpacks (Where's My Jet Pack?), Amelia (LIfe Moves Pretty FAst) and Bill (Make the Logo Bigger) area all folks I've gotten to know over several years as a blogger that I consider friends, even though we've never met. Following your gut is definitely the way to go.

Anthony

Friending your mom on Facebook was the highlight of my April. When do we get to guest-tweet, Neo?

JOCKO

I have gotten a few friend requests from clients on facebook and I admit that I was hesitant to click the "accept" button (although I did). I wish they would stick to LinkedIn.

Anyway, I think you have a good point, but as everything becomes more "open," we are going to have to be careful with what we post to these here internets.

DJ

I totally agree! I think due to the way Facebook came about (initially closed system, MySpace still popular), many people view the sanctity of Facebook the same way.

Every social network has its own vibe about it. Twitter is totally open now, but that's sure to end in the next year or so. Likewise, MySpace is open, but crap.

Stay strong - keep Facebook pure.

Jasmine Wilkinson

The whole social media thing has actually got me really thinking about who I actually consider a friend.

Facebook, for me, is for personal networking only - I use LinkedIn for business. I would never consider accepting a connection on Facebook with someone I don;t know, unless I have been introduced to them for some specific reason, and I also don;t even accept connections with everyone I do know.

There are some people I know that I actually don't like, and more importantly, do not want to be associated with for some reason.

Sometimes I wish there was actually a "no thanks!" button on Facebook friend requests!

Some people seem to think Facebook is a competition of popularity - but I think wuality, not quantity, is the order of the day. How many people can you realistically keep in touch with anyway? What's the point in getting a million more rubbish Funwall posts and application spams from someone you don't even communicate with anyway?

I was a late convert to Facebook, but I of course now love it for the pure networking and keeping in touch purpose.

I now cull my friends list on a regular basis - no offence to anyone that gets removed - it's just housekeeping, and likely that I accepted your friend request in the first place cos I have nothing against you and it was nice to say hi after all these years, but we are hardly going to message each other on a regular basis and I don;t need to see all your friends' baby pictures etc.

I also now cull my phone address book regularly - and it feels good!

Keep it real and keep business and pleasure separate I say!

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